The Secret To Finding Love: Stop Trying.

Isn’t it funny how when you’re putting yourself out there in the world, looking for love around every corner, it seems that love is nowhere to be found? And then, when you’re not looking for love, when it seems like the worst possible time in your life for love to make itself known, it shows up out of nowhere.

When I first met my husband, I wasn’t looking for love. In fact, I wasn’t even sure I wanted it. I was in the midst of recovering from some serious heartbreak – like the kind that completely debilitates you.

Luckily, I was on the upswing of that heartbreak. I was taking care of myself and giving my heart what it needed to recover. But I still wasn’t ready to go out and look for something new. I was at a point where I didn’t know if falling in love and putting my heart on the line like that again was even worth it. I didn’t think I would be able to survive another broken heart.

I was dating though. Not necessarily on purpose. It seemed like I was just trying to live my life, and then suddenly out of nowhere, I would be on a date with some guy. Like, you know when you’re going out with someone, and they think it’s a date, but you actually had no intention of it being a date? Those were the kinds of dates I kept finding myself on (awkward).

Amidst the fog that I was constantly stuck in, there was a light – a light that was drawing me in. That light was love, and it came in the form of an employee at my local grocery store (who also happened to be one of the most charming people I had ever met).

I knew that there was something there. Every time I saw him, I felt as though my heart was being charged back up. Like a dead car battery, every interaction was a pulse of energy, jumpstarting my heart, until finally I could feel it beating again.

It wasn’t the right time. I wasn’t looking for love, and I wasn’t ready for it. But there it was. And no matter how many times my brain said no, my heart just wouldn’t listen.

I guess sometimes, no matter what your brain is telling you, your heart just knows what’s best. So, I listened to my heart, and it’s the best decision I’ve ever made.

I’m not saying that you should just jump into a new relationship if you’re not ready for one. And I’m not saying that it’s not going to happen if you are ready. All I’m saying is that sometimes you just have to get out of your head and listen to your heart.

I’m pretty sure that had I been in a hurry to jump back into something new without taking the proper steps to care for myself, that love would have slipped me by again and again.

If you feel like you are ready for love, and you’re out there looking for it, don’t lose hope. But do take some time to get out of your head and listen to your heart. Our hearts have a way of guiding us to the things we need most. And it’s in those moments, when we give ourselves what we truly need, that love finds its way into our lives. Whether we want it to or not.


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